I Never Thanked Her Enough

 

When I turned eighteen, my grandma handed me a red cardigan she had knitted herself. The yarn was thick, the stitches slightly uneven, and the color louder than anything I usually wore. I knew it wasn’t trendy. I also knew it was probably all she could afford. I smiled, hugged her, and muttered a dry “Thanks,” already thinking about something else. She smiled back like it was the greatest moment of her week. A few weeks later, she was gone. Life moved fast after that, and the cardigan stayed folded in a drawer, untouched.

Years passed quietly. I grew older, became a mother, filled my life with responsibilities and routines. The red cardigan followed me from house to house, always packed carefully, never worn. Part of me avoided it. It reminded me of that moment, of how careless I had been with my words. Guilt has a strange way of hiding inside ordinary objects. I told myself I’d wear it someday, that I’d honor her then. But someday kept getting delayed by life.

Then my daughter turned fifteen. One afternoon, while helping me clean, she pulled the cardigan from the drawer and asked if she could try it on. The sight of her holding it made my chest tighten. She slipped her hand into the pocket and suddenly stopped. Her smile faded. She looked at me and said, “Mom… what’s this?” My heart started racing as she slowly pulled something out, something neither of us expected to see.

It was a small, folded note wrapped carefully in plastic. Inside, my grandma’s handwriting trembled across the paper. She wrote that she knew the cardigan wasn’t much, but she made it with love, stitch by stitch, thinking of me. She said she hoped it would keep me warm on hard days and remind me that I was never alone. Tucked behind the note was a little money she had saved, meant for me “just in case.” I broke down. My daughter hugged me as I cried for all the years I thought I’d lost her.

That day, my daughter wore the cardigan around the house, proud and glowing. I finally understood that my grandma’s gift was never just about the sweater. It was about love that waits patiently, even when we fail to recognize it at the right time. I never thanked her enough when she was alive, but every time that cardigan is worn now, I feel like she knows.